Champions
Of valentines that never came
And those whose names were never called
When choosing sides for basketball
Janis Ian, “At Seventeen”
Anyone who’s been reading this blog for a while, or knows me personally, can’t help but be aware I’m happy with the way my children are turning into adults who are very pleasant to know. I try to keep a lid on it, but I also think society in general hears too much about trouble and not enough about successes, especially in our public schools systems. If anyone wants to write a guest column bragging about your or other good students, I’ll be happy to consider posting it here.
But this photo isn’t posted only to celebrate Luke’s victory last night in the Western Oregon University Men’s Recreational Basketball tournament – an achievement he called “the apex of my collegiate athletic career”. It’s for Anne and Frank Dufay, and every other parent who has shared the heartbreak of their kid not making the varsity team in high school. We little realize when struggling through the waking-up-at-night phase of infant feedings, that it’s in many ways the easy part of parenting. The hardest is when our children face problems we can’t fix. Not just things that objective observers would deem important, like health, grades, college acceptance letters, unrequited love; but also or perhaps especially the ones others might dismiss as trivial in the grand scheme of life, but mean everything at the time.
Luke was cut early in tryouts for the freshman basketball squad at Wilson, after having been Most Valuable Player of his 8th grade team. He dusted off his pride and played on Portland Parks rec teams, until football took over his time and passion. When he went to Western, he decided he was done with football, and began playing recreational basketball for fitness and fun. Yesterday, he and his four team-mates won the championship game 58-39, cheered by three sets of proud parents and a total crowd of not more than 50 spectators. Honesty compels me to note that top-scorer Clarke Miller, on the left insisting on holding his t-shirt upside-down, played varsity for Wilson, and his 35 points were obviously a major factor in the victory. I don’t know whether Cody, Kyle, or Brandon, the other players, made their high school teams or not. I do know that sometimes, the end of a dream is not necessarily the end of the story. And sometimes the losses are part of the making of the man or woman.